Watch out, it's getting personal

I had the best intentions of blogging about interesting things this week. I wanted to finish up my "summer job" series and write about a few other topics, but I just haven't been motivated to write those things.

Truth be told, I just haven't been up to blogging period. I like to keep this blog mostly positive, upbeat and light - because it really is a "friends and family" blog so I don't really get too deeply personal or negative or down and I don't really know why other than I guess I never want anyone reading to get worried about me when I'm not my usual perky self. So, when I get in a "mood" so to speak, sometimes it's easier to keep the blog quiet during those times.

I decided though, that it's time to allow myself to be more open, more candid and more honest. If I'm in a down mood or a bad mood or whatever, it is ok to say so. I'm human, I'm allowed to have a bad day every now and then. So here we go.

Right now, I am just a little overwhelmed and a little stressed. It's hard to believe summer is half over already. I feel like life is on fast-forward. I love our activities and the things we do, but sometimes it can lead to me feeling like I have no time to catch my breath and re-charge. We go on vacation at the end of the month for a week, and while I'm looking forward to it, I feel like there is so much to do before we go, it's really kind of snuck up on me.

I'm trying to plan for things in the future too - a month from now, a couple months from now, even six months from now - fun things too - but when I get to the kind of point that I'm at right now, I have a hard time even seeing past tomorrow.

I feel bad and that I've been nothing but cranky with those around me and I apologize to anyone who has possibly been a victim of my funk. I have a running joke with a friend of mine that when I get in this kind of mood, I just want to go home and be a "friggin hermit" and then somehow I came up with a character I call "Hermit the Frig". (He's Kermit the Frog's super crabby cousin if you didn't know). Lately I have just been feeling like Hermit the Frig.

So what do I do to help myself and make things better? Well, for starters, I have a full day tomorrow all to myself, Nate will be working on his car and I have nothing to do - and I will be keeping it that way. I just need that kind of day. It will help big time. Tonight I'm crazy busy and Sunday I'm crazy busy, but Saturday is just for me.

Secondly, I am figuring out that I just need to slow down a bit and maybe say no a little more if I need to. Last summer it took me getting super sick and knocked down for a week to figure that out. This year I won't let that happen again, so I'm glad I'm figuring this out now. This isn't to say that I am truly going to permanently become Hermit the Frig, but I just have to work on balance.

Thirdly, I love making lists - so I need to make lists for my upcoming vacation, once I do that and have a way of crossing off my needs and "to-do's" it makes the whole thing seem much less daunting!

Finally, allowing myself to just lay it all out here on my blog and what not has helped immensely. I will continue to blog without fear. Like I said, I'm human, I'm not without faults and you know what, there is nothing wrong with that!

I think things will be better from here!