A letter to my former self

So, this week Nate and I celebrate five years of marriage - this Friday to be specific. Today through Friday I'll bring a series of posts reflecting on this as five feels like a significant number to me! Today's post, a letter to "bride to be" me.

Dear Bride to Be Beth,

In a few short days you will marry the love of your life and all of your dreams will finally come through. You've waited a long time for this day and I promise you it will be everything you ever wanted and more. However, I'm writing you from the future to offer a bit of advice in these final days. You did nothing wrong, but these are things I wish you'd known then that would've helped just a little bit as you prepared to be someone's wife.

First of all, stop stressing out so much about your current job situation. Yes your church job is being cut to part time. Yes you won't have benefits anymore if you stay. And yes, the job you have interviewed for and really, really want is taking their sweet time getting back to you, but guess what, when you get home from your honeymoon, they are going to call and offer you the job - so relax! Stop thinking about it so much and instead revel in the fact that you are a bride!

Second of all, stop stressing out about the purchase of your house. It might take you a few months, but you and Nate will get everything all figured out and worked out and you'll be homeowners by summer's end. You won't be homeless, you won't have to go live in an apartment. That is your house baby, ain't no one will be taking that away from you!

Third, stop and smell the roses. These moments, they will pass you by so fast. You will be amazed at how quickly it is all over and done. And I know you will cherish every last minute, but the above stresses may hinder you just a little bit. So just try your best. You'll have pictures and videos that will allow you to relive the day, but nothing compares to being there. Being present. Try hard to stay in the moment.

Fourth, it's going to be hot on your wedding day. After a spring filled with rainy cool days (that seemed to fall on every single day you had a wedding shower) it will be in the 90's on May 27th and there is nothing you can do about it. Deal with it. Oh and stop being a brat and go take pictures outside with your bridesmaids. Nate and the boys did it and you're going to regret the fact that you didn't.

And fifth, more for your actual marriage, just remember this boy you are marrying is not a boy. He is a man. He is not perfect and neither are you. Your relationship will be different now that you are living together. There will be moments that you frustrate one another or endure difficulties. But honey, it's normal. And for every moment like those, you will have double in moments of joy and excitement. You'll have wonderful and amazing adventures. Five years into your marriage you will find yourself loving Nate more than you ever thought possible and still growing every single day. And that's what it's really all about.

Love,
Happily married five years Beth

Some of what I wrote to myself is a little tongue and cheek and I just want to say here and now I have ZERO major regrets about our wedding day - but many of those things I wrote about are true and if I could change them, I might. But it truly was the happiest day of my life and I look back on it with nothing but joy in my heart.